Category: Humor

Hat tip to Patrick for providing this original content.

Alexandria Occasional Cortex came out hard over the weekend against the Electoral College, slamming the institution as a racist scam that makes white people’s votes count for “like, a lot more” than other people’s votes.

Not to worry, she has thought of a good solution: “What if we count all white people as three-fifths of a person instead of a full person? Then, good votes would count more than bad, racist votes. Like, four or five times more or something, because 3/5ths is only like 10% of a real vote.”

She then paused as she counted on her fingers and double-checked her math on her toes. “Yeah, it adds up. Case closed. This makes the program contain 247% fewer racisms.”

It was pointed out to her that this was racist, but she said that when you fight racism with other racism, it makes less racism. “1 bad racism plus 1 good racism equals zero racisms,” she said confidently.

I’ll note that just as I was publishing this breaking news, Occasional Cortex was still slamming the Electoral College as sexist after learning it doesn’t even have a gender studies program.

This horses ass and the Detroit Police Department are swinging at each other on Twitter over law enforcement’s use of facial recognition technology. Tlaib calls the tool bullshit. I think in this case she may be right as it her face actually matches horseshit.

Update at 7:04 (central): In my earlier haste I overlooked an important attribute that an actual country boy (thanks John) called me on. Both images have utters! So, bullshit is closer than horseshit….but in either case her face matches shit.

Hat Tip to Ms Little “Big” Men for this funny.

Hat Tip to “It Ain’t Holy Water”